Someone stepped on a nerve yesterday. One that I didn't know was exposed. She asked me how much I've lost and when I told her 38 since surgery, she responded with a resounding, "that's not that fast. You could have lost that by doing HCG".
I realized that was a touchy subject only after my retort, "What do you mean? That's 20 pounds a month." was sharper than I intended. If you were just to listen to the tone I used, you might have assumed I said something more along the lines of "What the H- did you say to me?"
I guess it has been bugging me a bit that my average is about 3 pounds a week (excluding the first week netting 16 big ones). I haven't been sticking right to the prescribed diet. There have been times I've had two tablespoons of ice cream or 4 Doritos. I've justified this by saying that this is my life now... And I am not going to eat just protein for the rest of my life, so I have to learn to deal with temptation, etc etc. However, based on yesterdays interaction and my continued irritation about it today, clearly I need to do some thinking around the subject. Am I fooling myself? Is 3-4lbs sufficient? Am I sabotaging my continued success? Do I secretly have unrealistic expectations?
More thoughts to come...... Off to work I go.
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I'm not going to lecture, because I know we've all cheated, but I'm pretty religious with the diet now. I've noticed the weeks that I don't lose are the weeks that I "mess up." Really, we've only got about 6 months when it's killer fast. A year total, and then it'll be killer hard. I find the longer I go without the junk, the easier it is (there's a whole pan of brownies upstairs. eh, they smell good, but eh, I'm not going to eat that) In one of our support group meetings someone made the comment "There's nothing that tastes as good as skinny feels." It's my new motto. Good luck with everything. I know it's hard!!!
ReplyDeleteSo I might add.. it is ok to eat a couple of doritos or ice cream.. sometimes for me it is just easier to get down.... so I do it (the ice cream). Pick your battles but enjoy life. Heck that is why you did it.. so you could enjoy life. Don't be in too much of a rush.. this is for the rest of your life. It WILL HAPPEN... I PROMISE!! Really -- I promise! BTW...I love your stories!!! :-) We need to do lunch and grab a jamba juice!!! Corinna
ReplyDeleteIt sucks how insensitive people can be sometimes. Don't let them discourage you. Nobody is perfect. And no matter what, 38 lbs is a big deal!
ReplyDeleteThere have been so many times that I feel like I'll go crazy from deprivation. But I am usually able to talk myself out of it. I remind myself that I will not be deprived forever. There is an end to this stage: goal weight. The better I am on the diet, the faster I will hit my goal, and the sooner I get to start slowly integrating some complex carbs. On top of that, my energy level is so much better now that I quit sugar & carbs, and I don't want to go back.
The other thing that helps is that my taste has really changed. Sugar now has a funny taste to me. I have given into temptation a few times at work, and every time I do, I find that I wasn't missing much.
Aimee and I have started going to the monthly support group at St Marks. It's really nice to be around people who have been through what you are going through, and to ask some questions to people who understand. You should come and see what you think. :)