Closet Raid

This weekend we headed 300 miles south to St. George Utah. Both sets of parentals live there and we have some friends that really know how to throw a killer Halloween party. We thought we'd go for a super quick trip given that I would be working at a trade show in Vegas this entire week and I could just head another hour and change south to the land of sin from there.

Due to some unbelievable events that have taken place in Chad's family, we always stay with my parents which afforded an opportunity to visit with my mom for a few hours. I was incredibly grateful for the leather jacket she had given to me a few weeks back and wondered what other treasures might be lurking in her closet. Unfortunately, that is, depending upon your POV, I was never able to raid my mom's closet when I was a teenager. As a matter of fact, I've never been able to raid anyone's closet or trade clothes when on girls trips to Vegas (which I wish we were still doing BTW).

Although I didn't end up "borrowing" anything for the trip, Mom has some great stuff. It's just too bad her feet aren't as gigantic as my flesh covered longboards; I might have had myself a complete outfit! Besides, I don't think I can stuff another thing in this dang suitcase. Its so heavy right now that I am a bit concerned I am going to get charged for being overweight on the flight home. Imagine that..... Once upon a time I was getting concerned about being charged extra on flights for being overweight myself and now I am just concerned for my suitcase!

All that being said, it is pretty damn gratifying knowing that I am able to trade clothes now. I know that closet raids and trading clothes doesn't happen much when you are a card carrying member of the adult club, but it sure is nice to think that it could! Yay for being a regular size!

Next stop, the Cosmopolitan....
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Out of the mouth of babes

This will be a short post as I am recovering from laughing so hard that I nearly busted a rib.  I showed Justin, my 9yo, the slideshow of my progress pictures and as we got to the picture of my pre-surgery barn-sized behind, he suddenly exclaimed "Whhhhoaaaahhh" to both his surprise and mine.

I suppose there is no hiding the truth.... hahahahaha

I thought I would share another picture with you this evening before I head off into the land of dreams...  which by all accounts is very different than the "Field of Dreams".  Although there are some similarities that might be explored more intently at a later date with respect to, "If you build it, he will come".  In my dreams, I have, on a rare occassion, built an entire fantasy around a real southern charmer turned beach fitness extraordinaire, Matthew McConaughey himself.  But alas, I digress....

It was after this day had ended that I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror as I looked over my shoulder while I was getting undressed and I decided that my reward when I get to my goal weight of 170, I am going to get boudoir pics taken.  Yes, I said it and I mean it.  But allow me to clarify....  I mean classy ones, in black and white, simplistic art with nothing private showing.  If you remember the scene between Helen Hunt and Greg Kinnear in "As Good as it Gets" where he begins to draw a picture of her as she fills the bathtub in her towel...  classy, timeless, and just for me to know how incredibly gorgeous I am and to serve as a reminder to NEVER, ever forget it again.

Find your bliss ladies, and live it.  Love yourself and don't ever forget that you are gorgeous right now as you are.

Finally! I figured out how to do this.... 
New pics have been added that follow me through 100 lbs lost and counting.

Sale! Pants- Half Off!

This picture is courtesy of an idea that I got from one of my very skinny friends:

I got a new pair of jeans on Friday and am still trying to wrap my head around the sizing. When I told my friend Maria that I had purchased my first entire outfit from the Buckle, she inquired about the size and we freaked each other out a little. My jeans are a 31, which apparently equates to an 11/12 or something like that.

She was completely astonished because she thought she wore a 30 (as it turns out, she wears a 29) and she was so excited that I was so close in size. Yet, I found myself making excuses for the size and downplaying how truly incredible it is. "Well, they are pretty tight right now...." "Yeah, but they are an eased fit..." "Well, they have stretch to them...." Etc etc.

So yesterday, as I was looking with disbelief at the jeans as they laid on the bed, I tried to visualize my body fitting in them in an attempt to come to grips with the fact that I am getting pretty thin now. Since I wore a size 14 in Jr. High, I simply cannot see myself as I am right now. My mind is stuck at a size 18 which is the thinnest I ever was as an adult.

I know it might sound weird, but I simply cannot fathom that I am only 2-3 sizes larger than my friends. That has NEVER been the case. I was always the token fat chick in the group. The one that couldn't ever trade clothes or steal the attention of the guys. That has been my role throughout my 37 years and it's going to be a hard thinking pattern to change.

In an effort to solidify the message to my brain about how much I have changed, I compared the old jeans to the new ones by laying the new ones next to the old. Unfortunately, the comparison wasn't strong enough so I decided to take it to the next level by putting the old pants on........ And I got into one leg of them!

I still can't fathom the scope of the change (perhaps it's because everything is floppy, and loose) but, I am working through it....

.......One leg at a time. BwaHahahahahahaha


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