Thoughts = Perception = Reality

For the last 2 days I have been in San Francisco finishing the rest of the training certification for Achieve Global's Sales programs. I was fortunate enough to be seated next to a woman who directed me to a book titled, The Luck Factor. Clearly I haven't read it yet but her description really made me think about a few things.

She said the basic assertion of the book is that luck is a perceived thing. In other words, you get what you look for. If you are always looking and waiting for the "other shoe to drop", it probably will. Those who have a positive outlook on life and all of its uncertainty will probably not perceive the same events in the same way. The same events would be occurring but because they look at it in another light it is viewed as less "unlucky" or perhaps, not about luck or negative circumstances at all.

I have always believed this and lived this way. I believe that even in the midst of the most trying of times, there are things we can learn and benefits to be gained if we look at it through a different set of lenses. I can distinctly remember times when I was giving more credence to the negative events than they deserved and they seemed to keep coming like hell fire until I changed my view of them. Suddenly, I felt very differently and although I didn't have any control over the events themselves, I did have complete control over my perception and subsequent reaction.

So I challenge you this week to change your lenses. How can you change your perspective? What can you learn from your circumstances? What benefit is there for the taking? What could you be missing out on by focusing on the wrong thing?

Change your perspective; change your reality.

Healthy Habit Household

As I sit here at the community center pool pondering all of the tasks I need to list out and begin working on for my work projects and for the business, I am “kindly” reminded of exactly where I am at the moment.  As if the high pitched, ear piercing squeals from the girls running around like whirling dervishes weren’t enough, every minute or so the air is punctured by the blaring lifeguard whistle aimed at the boys who are fearlessly playing a game of tackle football in the water.  My son is fortunately not one of them and is content to test the strength of his lungs as he attempts to swim around the whirlpool area without taking a breath. 

He is nearly 10 and is getting increasingly concerned about getting enough exercise.  I haven’t decided yet if he is merely using exercise as a synonym for play, but either way, I am happy about it.  He will have a natural propensity toward weight gain as his dad’s genetic make-up isn’t stellar either.  Although both his dad and I have a significant advantage in that we gain muscle very quickly, we both also gain fat quickly as well.  One of the things I believe has helped Justin is that we always have crap food around the house along with healthy snacks and the rule has always been that you canhave as many healthy snacks as you want, but the crap snacks are limited to 1 aday.  Justin routinely chooses the healthy options and now does a lot of the self regulation required with the crap.  He also has been asking to go with me on my runs in the mornings and has been doing push-ups, sit-ups and squats every now and again.

I am encouraged by the signs that I see with him.  Unfortunately, my dad tried to instill this behavior in us as kids, but there was a significant resistance to it and the food thing,…. well, that was a lost cause.  Our house was full of Pepsi and we regularly ate out due to the crazy schedule my mom had to keep with all of us in various youth sports all over the city.  My parents never kept crap in the house because we would devour it in no time and “ding dongs” were expensive(albeit, much more delicious back in the day I will argue).  Although the philosophy of out of sight, out of mind, never worked for me. 

My babysitting career was highly profitable and kept me busy nearly every weeknight and weekend where I didn’t have a sports commitment.  This, unfortunately for my waist line and thus my social life, led to many a ding dong bender at my client’s homes.  Embarrassing as it is to admit, I once ate an entire box over the course of a Saturday, because after I had already eaten four ding dongs, I figured an entire box (out of the 6 that were there) would be less noticeable than the large quantity out of a single box.  Yes, ridiculous logic, but remember that I was only 14 and highly intoxicated… on ding dong filling.

I thought that I was unable to handle the “freedom” of having sweets and crap food around due to my escapades as a youngster.  During college I found myself justifying purchases of crap “because it was my money and I earned it.”  Interesting that I was also slowly earning the consequences of the 9:30pm Mickey D’s French fry and Coca Cola drive through ritual.  It wasn’t until I was married and my husband was reading an over eaters anonymous book that I learned to think about things in an entirely different way.

The book bravely suggested to stockpile your favorite crap food in the house and keep it that way. If you had a love affair with Oreos, then buy 8 full size packages and when you are finished with one, go buy another; keeping 8 packages in the house at all times.  Surely this book had to be a joke right?  Surely they had to know that someone with a true eating disorder would plow through the Oreos and gain 87 pounds in a fortnight.  However, the concept is simple and through personal testimony quite effective.  You see, we are all animals at our core.  We are programmed for survival and when we feel like that survival is threatened, we will adapt and create behaviors that aren’t always favorable.  In a home where there is a limited amount of “good” stuff and you have to compete for it, there is an instinct that kicks in where “I better eat it now before someone else does or else I won’t get any.”  Using the technique outlined in that book, I was able to retrain myself that I can have them anytime I want….  Afterall, there were 8 bags in there! 

I believe that is the principle that has made the difference for Justin.  I believe that because we haven’t ever over-emphasized diet but rather focused on healthy choices and a healthy lifestyle, Justin has been able to make that leap early.  Granted, it probably also helps that he doesn’t have to worry about siblings stealing candy out of his Halloween stash from (9months ago) either.  :)  My only hope is that it continues and his outlook on healthy living, exercise and diet will continue to grow as he does.  I do not want him to experience the same frustration that I did through the first 36 years of my life.

Remember the Past & Brave the Future

Last weekend I had a chance to attend a soccer match of Salt Lake City's own professional soccer team, ReAL Salt Lake. I was chosen to attend with my Director as well as two of my colleagues for the work we did on a large initiative in Q1 of this year. The seats are part of the 100 Lions club where you receive dinner and dessert before the game, more food at half time and after the game, not to mention the snacks during the game and the open bar.

It was amazing how much food was there and it was actually quite good. However, the food, as you might guess, was of little interest to me. The game was the most exciting part and for a reason you might not expect. I'm not a huge ReAL fan. I don't follow the team, I don't have any ReAL team gear and I haven't been to a soccer game when my company hasn't paid. I'm simply intrigued by the idea that I could play once again and revive some of the memories of my youth.

Recently I have been looking for other activities to participate in because simply going to the gym has gotten stale and while I am infinitely pleased with my running progress, ultimately I need another challenge. In high school I went to state in both my Jr & Sr years for discus in Track and Field which is quite an accomplishment for a 4a division school in California. While on some level I would love to compete in that again, the solitary nature of the event isn't going to give me the pizazz I'm searching for. Thus, my fallback sports are tennis and soccer.

Both of those options are actually a bit scary. With tennis, my serve lacks strength and will get me hammered in any type of real match. With soccer, I'm not quite to the real adult league yet (over 40) so I must play in the pseudo adult league with all the college girls who are still too young to know anything about beanie babies much less Max Headroom. The fear of annihilation is real folks and it lives deep within the cavity of my heart.

Let's see if I can dig it out, shall we?